Wednesday, May 14, 2008

A nice reminder for us

As I was browsing through the Star Online this morning, I came across this article which makes a nice reminder for us all on how important our moms are. They are the ones who made us today and they are the pillars of our success. Mother's Day just passed by but my appreciation and gratitude to my mum will never fade fact it keeps on burning especially now that I am a mother myself.... I totally agree with what the writer writes in her article...let's see what you have to say...have a nice read :)

Wednesday May 14, 2008

Taking loved ones for granted

THE other day, my mum called to tell me that she and my fa-ther were considering buying two placements in a memorial park as their final resting place ''when the time comes''.
I know very well that there will come a time when we will leave this world, but it is not something I often think about.

It is okay to plan for birthdays, weddings and retirement, but planning for death is not the norm. Not because it is not logical or practical, but to think of death is to bring on fear.
My boyfriend asked me a few days ago if I fear death.

“No, but I fear pain. But what I fear most of all, are the deaths of my loved ones.”
Just the mere thought of not seeing my parents and brother again cripples me with fear. When my parents speak of where they would like their final resting place to be, I am afraid to listen and refuse to take it seriously.

My grandfather was taken ill recently, and when I paid him a visit I was reminded that even the strongest and healthiest of us will not stay that way forever.

My father is 53 this year. He goes to the gym a few times a week, takes care of his diet and is far from old. He is able to fix almost anything in the house and he still takes cares of me like he always does.

All these years, I have looked upon my father as someone who is infallible, strong and able to find a solution to any problems that I may have.

It scares me to think of the day when he will not be as he is now, when time and age catches up. I would rather not see the lines around his eyes, or how tired he looks at times. I don’t want to notice him limping a little sometimes because his feet hurt.

My father is not a superhero, but sometimes it is easy to forget that because of how well he takes care of the family and me. Too often, I take his love and his health for granted.
When someone loves you unconditionally, it is easy to be careless with that love, because you assume that it will always be there.

You forget to say thank you, or be polite, or even do something nice in return.
During a meeting with the managing director of a company who is interested in working with me on an endorsement project, he said something to me that no one has ever said before.
“No offence Xandria, I think your work is great but the reason you are here is because of your mum.”

“Your mum is such a good person. I think what you are today is because of your upbringing. So you have to thank your mum and dad,” he told me with a smile.

I couldn’t be happier or more proud hearing this. I have always wished that people could see that. My mum is my manager, and I have had people being nicer to me than they are to her.
Some have even been downright insensitive and rude to her, but sugary sweet to me.
I have never understood that. Being a manager of a company is not an easy task, and if the company runs smoothly, it is very much due to good management.

My career has been on a steady climb because my mum is an amazing businesswoman and manager. I have manners, respect, compassion and faith because my parents have taught me that.

I have written in a previous article that if someone should praise me, they should praise my parents 10 times over.

Many have asked me during interviews if I feel that my mum is overprotective as my manager, and my answer is that I am much more protective of her.

Even then, I cannot be a hypocrite. I cannot expect people to be nice and kind to my mum when there are many times when I have also hurt her with my impatience and attitude.

The worst part of it is that the hurt she experiences because of me is much more painful than those inflicted by others.

And the irony is that it is often easier to be nicer to acquaintances and friends, than it is to be mindful of the feelings of our loved ones.

Mother’s Day has just passed and Father’s Day is around the corner. Being able to celebrate these occasions is just a reminder of how fortunate we are to have known unconditional love.
Death is inevitable and maybe if we stop and think about death once in a while, we would appreciate life better.

1 comment:

Deana E said...

“No, but I fear pain. But what I fear most of all, are the deaths of my loved ones.”

i agree with the author..this is my greatest fear too.